


Super Wardrobe Malfunctions

by Vampyra142001



Series: Blue Love [1]
Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: Aliens, F/M, Implied alien genitals, Implied hetro sex, Implied homo sex, M/M, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-19
Updated: 2011-09-19
Packaged: 2021-01-03 22:42:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21187187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vampyra142001/pseuds/Vampyra142001
Summary: Post-movie. Megamind and Roxanne discuss Metro Man and how being a super is hard on clothing. Dialog heavy.





	Super Wardrobe Malfunctions

Super Wardrobe Malfunctions

By Kelli Dalton

Summary: Post-movie. Megamind and Roxanne discuss Metro Man and how being a super is hard on clothing.  
Pairings: Megamind/Roxanne, implied Megamind/Metro Man  
Warnings: Aliens (duh), implied alien genitals, implied hetero sex, implied homo sex, un-beta’d (feel free to point out mistakes nicely)  
Rating: PG-13? (Do tell me if I need to bump it up)

Somewhere deep inside the Not-So-Evil Lair an unusual couple lay in bed, recovering from their recent activities.

"Y'know, he's afraid of this - Music Man, I mean," said Roxanne, cuddling closer to her azure-hued boyfriend to emphasize what 'this' was.

"Actually, yes," Megamind replied.

"What, did you guys have a heart-to-heart over whether or not he dated me?"

"No, I believe you. I figured out he was afraid of inTIERcourse years ago."

"How did that happen? I can't see the two of you sitting down for civil man-talk back then." The reporter propped herself up on her elbow, eyeing Megamind curiously.

"Hardly. No, at the beginning of our game we were both quite young and therefore prone to mishaps."

"You had those throughout," interjected Roxanne.

"Not THAT kind. I'm talking about the kind of mishaps that would put our rivalry on hold and we'd never mention publicly."

"Like what?"

"Like Metro Man flying through a cloud of insects and tarnishing that 'perfect' smile of his, or when one of the brawnbots knocked me unconscious, or, most frequently, a wardrobe malfunction. Those kinds of things were just embarrassing and didn't do a thing for either of our images." His hands fluttered about with his descriptions, ending with a waving-off gesture. Megamind wasn't meeting her eyes with that last part, and despite his haughty tone, he had a faint blush.

The brunette rolled her eyes. "So you guys would call a time-out to pull yourselves together in the middle of a battle? That's kind of childish, but I can see your point."

"If you are done interrupting, Ms. Ritchie."

"Fine, fine. Continue."

"At the time, I was experimenting with shirts and capes that tore rather easily. After all, how can you haul someone off to prison by their collar if it won't hold under their weight? I was willing to go shirtless if it meant not listening to another of the warden's 'I'm disappointed in you' speeches. The particular day I'm referring to started rather normally, with me challenging Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes. The weapon I had chosen that day was an acid gun and because of how dangerous it was we were in an abandoned warehouse.

"My plan failed, Metro Man had to save me from falling into the acid all over the floor, and Minion had already run for safety. Due to my choice in attire Metro Man had his arm around me, holding me against his chest as he navigated through the melted mess I had made of the building. Away from the worst of the acid I began struggling to escape. Which, considering our ages at the time and my position against his body, probably wasn't the best idea. He did tell me to quit squirming, but I wasn't about to listen. So I inadvertently caused that particular wardrobe malfunction."

"Wait a minute. He got an erection and tore through his tights?" Roxanne gasped.

"Yes. May I continue?"

She nodded, still in awe.

"Now, I am not frightened by Metro MAHN and never have been, but even I must admit to being intimidated by his oversized organ. I was also questioning my own durability, and at that point I just tried to keep any part of myself away from his lower body. He said he didn't blame me and that he'd probably die a virgin. After he said that I assumed things were a little one-sided between the two of you."

"So you thought he was only pleasuring me in bed, since I wouldn't be able to handle him?"

"Pretty much."

They were silent for a couple minutes before the woman's curiosity got the better of her.

"I have to ask - What's Music Man hiding under those tights?" she inquired.

"A set of genitals different from my own, but certainly male. If you wish to know more that that, Ms. Ritchie you will have to ask him yourself."

"That's all you're going to tell me? That's just evil, Megamind."

"No, evil is the last little detail of this story," said her lover as he made himself more comfortable on the bed.

She watched with bland eyes as he snuggled into the mattress and crossed his arms behind his large head, attempting to be dramatic.

"Well?"

"He definitely isn't going to die a virgin."

**Author's Note:**

> For the original post: https://megamind-movie.livejournal.com/1229811.html


End file.
